Purpose and Mission

This website will be dedicated to providing information for people who have been a victim of an internet romance or dating scam.

It recognises that we have been caught by professional fraudsters.  We may or may not have lost money in this process. Anyone can be caught in such a fraud.  Increasingly we are seeing attempts to contact us not only by online dating sites, but all forms of online groups and social media, anywhere where names are found.

It will include

  • how to deal with our feelings
  • where to find support
  • resources
  • research
  • some scam scenarios, though other sites do this more extensively
  • warnings about changing scenarios.

In writing this blog, I hope it will help others to transition through the process of early realisation, victim, to survivor.  I welcome comments on the blog pages.

Early realisation is when we have just realised, by whatever mechanism, that we have been scammed. During this time there is much emotion, shock, embarrassment, and shame.  This is often suffered alone.

Victim is when we have accepted we have been scammed, but this fact is still running our lives.  We don’t trust others or ourselves.

Survivor is when we have fully come to terms with what has happened, we have recovered our equilibrium, and have moved on with our lives.  Within a safe environment we are OK about talking about what has happened.  We may also be willing to go public with our experience.